problem solving

when it comes to facing problems, i find it difficult to handle.
i'll solve it my way:
first, i'll be running away from it. the best step is: sleeping. to avoid making weird decisions, saying harsh words and stuffs, i'll first start avoiding those things. besides sleeping, i'll just go to somewhere else, i'll pray, recite the Quran or just get out of the 'crime scene'. i find it hard to deal with people. i don't like fighting and quarreling with anyone. i hate it.
so, when i hate someone, i'll start avoiding him/her.
however, things don't always happen the way we want them to. i'll sometimes say something hurtful.
i'm a normal human being, i can be angry, too. what do you expect me to do?

second, i'll start writing.
i write everything on a piece of paper, a book, my blog or anything that is reachable at that time. i can't face sadness, anger or anything negative. i'm just tired of it.

if you hate me, kill me.
nah, just kidding.
but please, if you hate me, stop saying bad words and criticizing me. i hate that. i can't live with all those words lingering in my mind. why don't you just kill me instead? like. seriously. serious.

next, i'll think about something else.
i'll search for something that can distract me. i don't wanna feel sad. my heart's already badly damaged. don't make it even worse.

i've never solved my problems by talking to someone. i don't tell people what i hate. i'll keep it.
when i tell you something that you can call my problems, i'm not trying to ask you to listen. i just want you to KNOW. there's reasons behind it.

Assalamualaikum.
have problems in life? get back to Allah.
don't be like me, I'm empty inside.